I feel somewhat on edge these past few days and I am not certain of the cause. It could be a lack of sleep, due to my habitual late hours despite the fact that I must awake early nearly every day. Maybe it's a seemingly constant work schedule, always waiting for the coveted one day off a week. is it the fact that I somewhat lost one of the people I can talk about serious things to?

I think that it mainly falls on the fact that I'm just constantly waiting for August 23rd to roll around the corner so I can return to school. And it is barely mid June.

The things I look forward to in life are just on a day to day basis other than that. Constantly thinking in my head, "Just two more hours and I can go home," while glancing up at the clock as I am midway through brewing another pot of Colombian Supremo. "Tomorrow I get to hang out with so-and-so. I don't know what we're doing, but at least it's a break from here and home."

My hands look rougher than before. I have too many calluses. They are reserved for the boys with clumsy fingers plucking on strings, not for a girl who barely has time to pick up a guitar but enough to just sleep and sleep and sleep. Awaking when a loud local car dealer commercial pops upon the television screen.

The eating habits are off. I feel as if I barely have enough time to sit down and eat a real meal in the day. I need to catch up on my sleep. On my socializing with friends from school, also hell bent on wanting to return as soon as possible.

I need this trip to the beach in July. I don't care if it is with some relatives I cannot stand. It will be perfectly fine with me, for it will all be about relaxation for me, instead of providing it for others.

I have successfully and finally planned out a trip to visit Lauren in New Jersey for the end of the month. I will be spending part of the weekend at her house, and then we're going to go see some live music. The choice is between Math The Band or seeing her boyfriend Kyle and others play at this fundraiser festival of sorts. Either would be fine by me, because I just want to hang out with my close friend.

It's so strange, being back home from school. I've probably said it plenty of times, but I really have nothing fun to do here. I work six days a week, and only have Fridays off. And it is very hard for me to do something at night, considering I work mostly opening jobs and would have no willpower to wake up that next day. When I'm not working, I'm usually doing absolutely nothing or either hanging out with Gillian, Wes or Carrie. Sometimes Christi as well.

I just really want to go back to school. I miss it so so much. I've been wanting to go back since the first week I've been here. People keep saying that it will change, but I highly doubt it. School is my new home now.